What I Want My Words to Do To You... *

What I want my words to do to you,
Is to make you shudder and stop,
Each time you decide,
To decide my decisions for me.

I shall let tomorrow’s verses come to me,
Tomorrow,
And today, today’s.
Also, those of all lost yesterdays.
Feel with me, sing with me,
Of days gone by,
Days wished, willed but never had,
Days to come…

What I want my words to do to you,
Is to make you shudder and stop,
Each time you choose to tell me,
It matters less, that I be happy,
And more, that I obey.

Did you know that there are –
Big battles I can brave,
Wild wars I can wage,
Yet some small skirmishes I cannot.

Bend for me, please,
I cannot fight you...
In your love you, like an impermeable wall,
Separate,
My joys – half here, half there.
We both know what I will choose,
But can you save me –
From bitterness?
From loss; the knowledge of my loss?
Can you unwind the unwilled twists and turns,
Of my half-lived half-loved heart?

What I want my words to do to you,
Is melt your loving stubborn heart…
Through verses, to have conversations,
That age gaps and rusty communication,
Have never let us have.

What I want my words to do to you,
Is love me your way, but also my way,
To love the willful voice in me,
For it is me more than all else.

What I want my words to do to you,
Is love me enough…
…to let me go –
Liberated yet loved,
For all that I am.

Feb 12th, 2010.


* [The phrase 'What I Want My Words to Do To You' is borrowed from the title of a film by the same name by playwright Eve Ensler]